And now, the news I've been waiting to share...

I've been keeping a little secret from you, dear reader, perhaps for too long.

It distracted me a bit from blogging through the month of December, so I really owe you the explanation. It will only get more and more difficult to hide, even in this blogging world where secrets can more easily be kept. (If you know me in person, or on Facebook, or if we've emailed recently, then you already know.)

Remember this post from October? You were all so empathetic, so sweet -- and so many of you could, it grieved me to learn, relate from your own experience.

And so, as we cried together then, I know you will rejoice with me when I tell you that... we are expecting again!

We waited a bit longer than we ever have before sharing our good news. Losing one does seem to make it more difficult the next time. I'm currently 14 weeks along, due at the end of July.

The nausea has (mostly) subsided, and I am anticipating baby's first kicks very soon. I've heard the little heartbeat twice, and we are praying that everything continues normally and covered by God's grace!

We know we are already so very, very blessed. And we covet your prayers, nonetheless.

Highlights of our Christmas weekend

Okay, I titled this "Highlights," and then I went a little nuts uploading photos, so forgive me...

Christmas Eve day, while the nana, mama and auntie did some last minute shopping and wrapping, Papa engaged the boys in a nice long game of Risk -- over hot chocolate, to keep up their strategizing energy, of course. (UberDad was busy with his measuring tape and table saw, and still is.)

As it turns out, I absolutely did not die from not having a finished kitchen for Christmas.  Imagine that.  ;)  And, thanks to the generous hospitality of my brother- and sister-in-law, neither did we have to eat take-out!

Instead, we had a delicious spread of homemade Mexican food -- three kinds of enchiladas, tacos and nachos. Everyone's plate looked different! (Though I was too busy eating to take pictures of the food.)

After dinner, some of the adults indulged in beverages, while the boys played a few sober games of chess...

Middlest amused himself with my camera, taking pictures of the dogs and his cousin...

Some gift-giving was in order, of course...

I'm not sure how our gracious hosts escaped the camera -- my only excuse is that I was too distracted by a raging sinus headache and, well, my sister-in-law's chocolate pie.

Then, early Christmas morning...

Eldest was up before anyone, as usual. He patiently waited for the rest of us to greet the sun. Scott's mom was up next, then Scott. My parents brought over coffee and scones; my sister brought more presents.

My sister and Middlest opened their stockings while we waited for the last sleepyhead.

And the Littlest slept on...

And, here we go!

Do you think we get a little too happy about presents??

Then it was time to play...

RC cars, Legos, more Risk, and a few dozen rounds of Uno before dinner...

 
It was a very, merry Christmas.

Prayers for a kitchen in Advent

Lord, help me remember that I WILL NOT DIE if my kitchen isn't finished before Christmas.

Dad, if you even hint at the words "I told you so," you won't be getting a Christmas present. :P

How in the world am I going to host Christmas Eve for Scott's family without even a kitchen sink?!

Lord, help me remember that Christmas will still be Christmas even if I don't have a kitchen yet...

Such have been my thoughts and prayers the last few weeks. One-track.

It felt like a small miracle when I finished prepping and priming the cabinets, and we could finally bring them out of the weather and into the house. I knew there was little chance of having the kitchen ready for Thanksgiving, but I still hoped we could move things along in time for Christmas.

Scott has worked every possible minute of the last three weekends on the cabinets, adapting, levelling, installing, matching the new to the old, even building one from scratch where we had an unexpected hole. Every bit of this kitchen project has been tedious, one person working at a time, step by tiny step.

There is no speeding the process up. There is no HGTV or DIY Network crew standing by to help get the job done in four days flat. There is no budget for hiring a team of experts. This is our DIY project, and we are doing it ourselves, however long it takes, and with the understanding that the ability to do any of it at all is a blessing.

It seems the theme of the last several posts here has been waiting. As I learned from Kimberlee Conway Ireton, wait is also the watchword for this first week of Advent. I'm thinking it's also my personal watchword of the year.

In any case, I am clinging desperately to the knowledge that this season is about CHRIST.  Not about having a pretty, decorated house. Not about baking cookies to give away. Not about being a good hostess, or making everything perfectly "Christmasy." Not about me.

I have struggled the last several months with the guilt that this kitchen remodel has taken so much of my focus, time, and energy, that I have been so unavailable to do for others. I have wondered if it will feel like a stolen blessing when it's over.

I absolutely must rest in the knowledge that this project is even more temporal than this life. That every moment is a gift, but the greatest gift is Christ. That I need only to praise Him in thankfulness -- no matter the circumstance, no matter how chaotic my life looks and feels, no matter how I fail to be like Him.

I want to infuse my veins with the Gospel, a constant reminder that He came, He died, He rose again -- His work is done, even if mine is not.

I will await His coming expectantly, doing what I can to prepare, but knowing that ultimately, His perfect timing does not, and will never, depend on me.


May our hearts and minds remain focused on the Lord this Advent as we anticipate and celebrate the holy day of Christmas. Amen.

Guest post: Waiting on God's Timing

As the season of Advent begins, and we await the joyous celebration of our Lord's birth, I am happy to share with you this guest post by blogger and new mom Heather at ThenComesMercy.com.

Waiting on God's Timing

I was five days past my due date. The idea of leaving the house—even just to pick up a gallon of milk—felt overwhelming. We live in a small town and everyone from our neighbors to the ladies at our community bank knew my due date. When the date came and went without fanfare, both my husband and I were inundated with calls, texts, Facebook messages:

"Where's the baby?"

"He sure is taking his sweet time!"

"You must feel so disappointed that he's still not here yet!"

I started sending my husband out for milk and bread and sequestered myself in the house. Each day, we prayed for God to send our son. Each evening, I would get ready for bed again with a heavy heart.

To be completely honest, the waiting seemed, well, unfair—we'd had a miscarriage the year before and it'd taken several months for us to get a positive pregnancy test again. Then God spoke to me about my heart—did I really feel entitled to be a mom? Did I view it as something God owed me, rather than a grace—a totally undeserved gift? 

I'm ashamed to admit that I did view it as an automatic, no-questions-asked "next chapter" in our lives: marriage, buying a house, having a baby. Over the past year, He has shown me the truth of Isaiah 55:8-9: "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." 

In case you're wondering, the waiting didn't last forever. On the evening of October 14, my water broke and—shortly after noon on October 15, 2011—our baby boy was born. Even after nine months of preparation, I was still in disbelief that the waiting was over. I was in awe of the blessing which, somehow, still felt unexpected. Seeing our baby open his eyes for the first time was a moment I'll never forget.

I do not have a son now because of my faith or because of any good works I've done. I truly believe it is a mercy of God. Undeserved, given due to nothing in me. This gift is for His own purposes. I pray for a spirit like Hannah's in the Bible (1 Samuel 1:27-28)—to recognize that this child is not mine. To remember that waiting yields fruit in God's timing. To remember that God's timing is not my timing, but that it is far better—it is perfect.


Congratulations, Heather, on the arrival of your baby boy! God is always faithful when we wait on Him! For more of Heather, please visit her blog at ThenComesMercy.com.

Now it feels like fall.

I want to thank you for your understanding words and comforting prayers after my last post. They have helped so much.

"I believe that I shall see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"

- Psalm 27:13-14

I found this verse in my inbox after leaving the lab for my final hCG blood test yesterday. He always knows just what Words to send us, doesn't He?

October has certainly been a month of waiting. But it finally feels like fall in my neighborhood, and that is comforting in itself.

Last week we baked our favorite pumpkin cookies to share at our homeschool group's harvest party. It's tradition to visit the pumpkin patch and corn maze, then to celebrate afterward with a party at the park.

And, of course, I have to take lots of pictures...

Everyone brings treats to share. The kids decorate their bags, then the moms line up with the goodies.

We can't have a harvest party without apple bobbing!

 

We are abundantly blessed!!

How are enjoying the season of autumn?