Exploding heads?

In response to Crunchy Bunch's question about exploding heads...

Don't let the kids watch this until you've approved it. It caught me so off-guard that I jumped and woke up Baby Crabcakes, who was sleeping on my lap.

It's good fodder for discussion of why we don't believe everything we see on TV (or video).

Confessions of gluttony.

Breastfeeding moms are supposed to LOSE weight, not gain it, right? 'Cause I think I gained 8 pounds this week.

Maybe it had something to do with the five pieces of cake I ate to celebrate my mother's birthday on Sunday. I swear, I wasn't just being a pig. She had three different cakes given to her on two different days. I was just trying to help!

Maybe it was the four dozen oatmeal-chocolate chip-pecan cookies I baked for the Not-Back-To-School Party on Wednesday. Turns out the kids were more interested in root beer floats, so I took two dozen cookies home with me. And ate them all Thursday.

Or maybe it was the box of a dozen See's chocolates my mother-in-law sent home with UberDad because she was cleaning out her pantry before she left for a three-month trip to South Dakota. I shared one with my neighbor, one with my mother, and one each with Puffer and Grouper. There are two left. UberDad didn't eat any.

All summer I've been wearing the same pair of drawstring khaki shorts because nothing else fit yet. At eight weeks postpartum, I realized I'd actually lost all my pregnancy weight! (Though I started my pregnancy 15 pounds over what I need to be to wear most of my clothing.) Hooray! I could finally wear a different pair of shorts!

Then yesterday I noticed those shorts had gotten significantly TIGHTER. And the one skirt that fits me didn't look so great anymore. *Sigh* And I was planning to bake UberDad a pie for his birthday today.

My eating habits this week could also explain why I've been so tired and unfocused the last couple days. Looks like I'll have to detox before Family Camp next weekend, or the altitude might do me in.

It's going to be a busy week. This afternoon we get to visit with a dear friend we haven't seen in a year at a birthday picnic for UberDad. Monday I need to go grocery shopping. Tuesday we're going to my friend Emily's for a playdate. Wednesday we meet some homeschooling friends to try the Mentos and Diet Coke experiment and play in the water park around the corner. Then I've got to do laundry, clean the house, go to Target and finish packing before a birthday party Friday night. We leave Saturday morning for the Sequioas.

Oh, and I really wanted to knit Baby Crabcakes a hat before taking him for his first trip to mountains. We'll see how that goes. I might need some chocolate to keep up my energy...

I would blog more if I weren't so busy parenting.

I've had exactly 1,093 thoughts I wanted to blog this week, but I haven't been able to focus on any one of them long enough to do what it takes to post. By the time I've convinced the male members of my household that YES, even MOMMY deserves a turn on the computer, I've either forgotten what I wanted to write, or the baby's awake and hungry again.

The teeny tiny corner of my brain my creativity occupies is quickly shriveling up, as IQ points are leached out to produce the richest hindmilk available to a baby this side of the neighborhood park. I hope Baby Crabcakes appreciates my sacrifice. His mother could be a much more popular blogger if she didn't spend so much time in his favorite horizontal nursing position. It's hard to blog from the bed. Maybe I should ask for a laptop for Christmas.

God is good. All the time. Even on Grocery Day.

I had my very first trip to the grocery store as the mother of three today. It was the excursion I'd been dreading all summer. (Would Baby Crabcakes cry the whole way there? What if he needed to nurse halfway through the store? What if I had to plop down on the sticky floor with a screaming baby while his brothers ran up and down the aisle hitting each other with those balloons on sticks they sell in the floral section? What if the baby pooped all over me while I was bagging my groceries? What I lose my mind? Would they kick me out? Would someone try to steal my fashionable diaper bag?!?)

As usual, God's grace was more than sufficient for my worries. So sufficient that I found myself tearing up as I said a prayer of thanks on the way home -- because NO ONE CRIED during the ENTIRE THREE-HOUR TRIP. It was a miracle. It truly was. The discount grocery store is 20 minutes from home in the middle of the day. Baby Crabcakes has never been happy in the car longer than 10.

Fortunately, his mother isn't completely stupid. Our first stop was Starb**ks, about halfway there. Grouper wanted to return the "Power Rangers" DVD he rented last week and get "Bionicle" next. Blockbuster is right next door to Starb**ks, but it wasn't open yet, so we decided to get a snack first. I know there are mothers who like to use treats as a reward for proper grocery store behavior on the way home. I'm of the "preventive treat" persuasion. Get the treat first, then when they ask for goodies in the store, you can remind them that they already got something. Since their blood sugar's already up, they don't complain. Besides, I really needed that iced soy mocha.

We settled in among the men reading newspapers and working on laptops to wait for the video store to open. Puffer and Grouper nibbled their tiny cafe scones, I got my chocolate fix, and Baby Crabcakes quietly nursed to sleep (Miracle #1!). Then I tightened up the sling, and we headed for our first official errand. Miracle #2: Blockbuster didn't have any of the "Bionicle" movies, but Grouper didn't make a peep. Just decided to get "Batman" instead. (Hallelujah!)

Miracle #3: Crabcakes stayed asleep being moved from sling to carseat.

We drove the rest of the way to the grocery store, and I remembered that we were out of cat food. The pet store is right next door, so we headed in there first. Pet stores are super-cool free entertainment for kids, in case you haven't been to one. We looked at all the fancy expensive birds, the geckos and snakes, the tarantulas and hermit crabs, mice and guinea pigs. Really, why pay zoo admission fees?

Did I mention that the budget's a little tight this month? We really tried to prepare for a month without a paycheck, but having a baby can get expensive. I had exactly $100 in cash when I left home. Spent $7+ at Starb**ks, $17+ at Petco, and had $74 plus change left for groceries. Miracle #4: We got everything we needed, including chocolate chips, for $74.09.

And a store employee even bagged my groceries!

Miracle #6: Baby Crabcakes didn't poop or cry until after I'd unloaded the groceries and put the cold stuff away.

I don't expect every Grocery Day to be so full of blessings. But I'll try to stay hopeful.