Missing you.

I've been thinking about friendship a lot lately. I have a lot of friends that I don't get to see nearly as much as I'd like, and I miss them -- that is, you, because I know some of you read my blog. Some friends live too far to see very often, but others live in town and it seems almost as challenging to get together.

I think I've relied a lot on organized activities and readymade social groups to keep me in regular contact with my favorite people. But a lot of things have changed this year, and that's not working so well anymore. Our home improvement co-op hasn't met yet this season, and I've missed it. Several of the kids were in soccer, one dad works weekends, and Saturdays were just too booked. Our homeschooling co-op ended abruptly this summer, and I haven't managed to stay in contact with two of the moms I liked the best. Sundays it's hit or miss whether we ever see some of our church friends, mostly because of Sunday school committments and our own inconsistency. And our unschooling group hasn't gotten together at all this fall. We haven't even spent much time with our gardening friends -- and they come to our house every week!

We have gotten to know our neighbors really well. It's nice to have friends so conveniently located. And I don't know what I'd do without Knitting Night. But I feel sad about not seeing the friends who are less "convenient." It seems silly. But life just goes so fast when you have kids. Maybe I need to lower my expectations, increase my efforts to reach out, and just trust that the fact that we're not getting together as often does NOT mean we're any less friends.

Knitting Frenzy!

I hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving! I ate so much that I slept all night without waking up hungry two or three times like I usually do! UberDad's mom did most of the work this year. All I did was roast some acorn squash, super easy. Instead of cooking, I spent most of the day knitting.

I've been a knitting FIEND this week!! If I could ever drag myself to the camera store to get my digital camera fixed, I could actually post some finished projects. They've all been hats so far. One each for the boys, one for a friend's preemie, one for UberDad for Christmas. I've got a few other things in the works, but some of them are secrets. ;) Carla and I are heading to the craft store today for more yarn!

Have I mentioned we have an ultrasound scheduled for January 9? So, hopefully we'll find out whether we're having a boy or a girl! Yes, I know it's exciting for it to be a surprise. Grouper was a surprise because the umbilical cord was wrapped between his legs hiding everything. But we'd really like some time to bond with and prepare for #3. We didn't even have a name picked out for Grouper, and for a few days I kept forgetting what we'd named him!

Anyhow, when Christmas is over and we, God willing, know what gender this baby is, I'm going to go crazy knitting baby stuff! I've been checking out diaper soakers (covers) and baby pants patterns on the web, and there are SO many cute ideas! I'm off to the yarn store, but you can look at my new favorite sites here:

Diaper Pages

Tiny Bird's Soaker

Little Turtle Knits

Holy Sheep Yarns

Definition of Radical Christian Unschooling

Someone posted this fabulous definition on the Radical Christian Unschooling yahoo group I belong to, and I thought I'd share since not everyone who reads this blog is familiar with the idea.

"Radical Unschooling is the Trust that a child will seek out and learn what he needs to know, when he needs to know it, without coercion, without school or school type methods, in the freedom and safety of his family. Our role as parents is to facilitate and make available our time, space, money, and lives to helping them explore the world.

Radical Christian Unschooling is the Trust that not only will a child seek out and learn what he needs to know when he needs to know it, without coercion, without school or school type methods, in the freedom and safety of his family, but that God will direct the child's path Himself. Our role as parents is to act as guides and mentors in the learning process, and to disciple our children in our Faith through our daily example of walking out our faith before their eyes."

--Susan McGlohn

Goodbye SuperMom, nice to see you Lazy Mom

So, I'm up bright and early this morning for some reason. Maybe it's because I relaxed yesterday afternoon instead of wearing myself out trying to be the perfect mom and housekeeper, and even went to bed on time. Yesterday I realized why I'm usually much more lazy than I was on Monday or Tuesday. Because I get GROUCHY.

My idea for this week was to try to stay more organized in my approach to parenting. Normally, I get away with ignoring the dishes until the next morning and the clutter until it's out of control, and I feed or give attention on demand instead of anticipating the boys' every need. (I've considered changing this blog's name to Lazy Mom since it might be more accurate.) I knew I'd have to increase my involvement this week to keep everyone happy, including myself. But I should have taken a break on Tuesday instead of getting so obsessive about it. I don't think I sat down between 4 and 8 p.m. except for 10 minutes to eat dinner. That might be normal for some parents, but NOT for me.

So, instead of lying in bed another hour just because I could have, I got up and made my tea so I'd be sure to finish it before I had three hungry boys to take care of. Having a few minutes of quiet first thing in the morning really does make a difference. Maybe today I won't have to lock myself in the closet.

On that note, I don't think my friend's ex was simply overwhelmed by his role as a daytime parent. Apparently he spent much of the day sleeping while his grandfather or brother watched his son. He had a history of self-centered decision-making, which was why their marriage ended in the first place.

The two full-time, at-home dads I know very well are FABULOUS in their roles. There is nothing in their genetic make-up that prevents that possibility.

Well, my boys are up, and sippy cups must be found. After all, Lazy Mom didn't finish the kitchen last night. But she IS in a good mood. :)