The tree is finally complete, the shelves have been dusted, the toys decluttered, laundry folded and put away, fridge and freezer stocked, three batches of cookies baked. Everyone has helped to make the house festive...
We've had our first Christmas party with friends.
My shopping is just about finished. (My crafting was hardly begun.) The packages that cluttered one end of my dining table for three days have been mailed.
Even the weather is ready for Christmas. The mulberries -- the last trees to change color each December and announce the impending arrival of Christmas -- have dropped their leaves, carpeting the neighborhood in bright yellow shag. The rain has been cleaning the air outside.
So, when will my heart be ready? Why does it feel so heavy?
I simplified. I planned. We made our own fun when the plans were derailed. The derailing continues, but that's to be expected. Two colds and the flu in the middle of sugar and stress season.
I am off my diet, friends. We've been reading our Advent book, but I haven't been doing my own devotions. I am not taking care of myself, nor am I spending enough time with the Lord. We are all suffering for it. The house may look festive, but our hearts are not feeling it.
In those days John the Baptist came, preaching in the wilderness of Judea and saying, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come near.
--Matthew 3:1-2
I have a week to spend down on my knees, to let Him teach me patience while I cry out in impatience, to put my eyes back on Him, where they belong. I have a week to slow down, and give my energy to my family, who deserve it.
It is a long journey, this wait for the arrival of the King.
Waiting for the King can get hard but it seems to me you can mark off "pray without ceasing" from your 2009 list. As I read your words, listen to your joys and worries, scroll through pictures captured of a family in daily worship, it is obvious to this old woman who's traveled your roads, that the King is at work in you, sweet Amanda. Take a deep breath. Our King lives!
ReplyDeleteI have been struggling a lot this season as well, for various reasons, but one of the big ones for me--aside from time with the Lord despite our family devotions each day I need to find time alone to spend with Him, is diet, supplements (both of which I have been doing all right with though I am not getting enough raw veggies which I can feel), but a key thing I found that helps (I have adrenal fatigue as well but combined with Candida overgrowth) is to have a 2x daily detox "shake". The key ingredients are bentonite powder and psyllium powder and if I haven't had it during the day either olive or coconut oil. The oil is antifungal and kills the yeast overgrowth but the bentonite absorbs toxins and the psyllium combined with water push them through the system. The last week I have been skimping and have been extra emotional, moody, and bloated (the kids take it as well and since I have been forgetting theirs they have been an emotional mess as well.) I am mentioning it because it helps to detox your body and if you are dealing with adrenal fatigue the bentonite and psyllium mixture would probably help a lot (and both are fairly cheap compared to buying "detox" specific supplements.) I mix mine with magnesium and drink it like that as does Esther, Rachel and Issac prefer theirs as a smoothie or ice cream free milk shake.
ReplyDeleteI am sort of spacey today so that has a lot of run on sentences but you get the idea. Which reminds me-- need to remember my psyllium. :)
Amanda,
ReplyDeleteI don't feel very festive this year either... for obvious reasons. Since Hunter won't be out of the hospital until after Christmas, we are sorta putting everything on hold until Ronald McDonald house. And then we will try to celebrate as best we can.
Heather,
Thank you for the detox shake idea. I am going to buy those ingredients and give it a try. I will also give it to ronin as well :)
I have the same felt pin up!! Listen, my friend. You take care of yourself. Set aside 15 minutes a day to pray alone to God. I will pray for you!
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